duct tape to the rescue

•March 10, 2018 • Leave a Comment


Maybe I needed chocolate, a glass of wine or a nap. My nerves of steel frayed this past week. I missed my old self. I told my massage therapist that I loved salsa, flamenco and tango dance and had planned going back to dance for the new year; get on a new groove. Chiro says no dancing for a bit. The Universe thought it best that I slow down.

I have nothing against slowing down. I wish I didn’t have to hurt so much.

Wednesday morning started with an MRI, lying very very still inside a loud machine that whirled and howled with sound. Three scans at 15 minutes each. It was surreal. Imagine the muppets, Beaker and Animal in robot versions talking and playing didgeridoo for a 45 minute concert.

A part of me is still in disbelief…

I’m feeling hurt from something that happened in December????

My Wednesday appointments didn’t allow for time to grab lunch so I began my teaching day on an empty stomach and a mind full of self-pity. I broke down in tears during my commute. It was the first time I cried since the accident. Me! Crying! My world is definitely upside down.

I didn’t feel as terrible last week. What have I done differently this week? I’m brainstorming here how to hack my body. I wore high heels one day for a couple of hours. Was that it? I finally found a roommate. Perhaps, I did not have time to feel as much pain because the stress of interviewing people masked it?? What’s different? The weather???

I didn’t cancel my Friday night date. I hadn’t mentioned being in a car accident. Too many more interesting things to talk about like bitcoin! We met for sushi and had a good time getting to know each other. He knew nothing of bitcoin and has never heard the word “blockchain” but he was sweet and kind.

He undestood pain can be annoying and that some people like to keep their complaining to a minimum so that they can soldier on with life.

My date was, after all, a stage combat instructor; a stunt guy. Stunt people are a special breed. I once met a guy who duct taped himself so he can continue filming. I have friends who light themselves on fire, drive monster cars, and roll down stairs while wearing high heels all in a day’s work. These folks literally smile through the punches.

I called it a night before 10pm. I needed to soak in the tub, rest, duct tape myself.

I wore a corset the next day and found it gave my back support. Yay. Pain managed for a day; inspired by remembering a friend who duct taped himself. I played the piano for a couple of hours and restored a piece of my spirit.

I hope I enjoy another good day at the piano today. Time to duct tape (corset) myself.



my superpower is invisibility

•February 10, 2018 • Leave a Comment

I wish.

I’m more stealth than invisible.

I wear headphones that sometimes don’t even have music going. I wear a hat and hope that since I don’t see you, you can’t see me. And I move swiftly through crowds because I’m fast,
compact size, stealth and maybe
a tiny bit invisible.

It’s easier to say I’m shy. Then strangers assuming something is wrong with me suggest I ought to change friends or my job before knowing that I love my work and my friends. Needing to explain myself instead of the organic-let’s-take-time-get-to-know-each-other makes them the exhausting component. Do people really become instant friends and lovers? How’s that working for you????

It’s hard for some to understand. That sometimes being with people is like running an app that drains the battery quickly.

And to the surprise of some, they wonder how an introverted person can have so many friends. Friends that call on me across the ocean when I get hurt….friends that will think of me as I search for a roommate when they live on the other side of the country.

Quiet people are not nonexistent. They build lives that allow admission to just a few at a time who let time and friendship tame the wildness and grow roots.

I’m building a kingdom. It’s surrounded by a mighty forest and the people in it are treasured and very special to me. I don’t leave the private keys for just anyone. Together we are swift, stealth and a little bit invisible.

I’m having a weird week. Thanks for humoring my thoughts.


ambulance chasers

•January 21, 2018 • Leave a Comment


They’ve been the brunt of jokes. Is it an American thing or do other countries also have humor that looks at attorneys with disdain?

I have quite a few attorneys in my life and I’ve never really needed one. Maybe I will call upon a friend for advice every blue moon or refer a friend to an entertainment lawyer. I am close to them mostly due to their other interests like music and their families. We talk about LIFE like normal people. They tell me of concerts they have attended; their favorite pianists. I hear how they studied music as a child and didn’t get reading music down and want to make sure their child can read notation with ease. They lament at their child’s pop music fascinations and we rally together to broaden their classical training while fitting in pop.

So when my roommate decided to rib me on now having an “ambulance chaser” who’s a dear friend of a student’s family, I took pause and asked him who’s side is he on?

There are attorneys who take on companies advocating for people that could easily be swept away if they didn’t have representation and there are attorneys who fight on behalf of company entities. Why make a huge sweeping judgement on a whole group of people when there are a lot of compassionate good professionals willing to go to bat for an individual?

This ambulance chaser joke stops people from seeking help navigating through complex terrain. Believe me, I had no idea how tedious the process is. My car got rear-ended before Christmas and I’ve been waiting on reports before I can sort my car out. Meanwhile, I also hurt and am finding that the pain is not going away as fast as I’d like.

Today, I finally get to take my car in to begin repairs. I couldn’t be happier with who’s on my side. They are kind and they are fierce. They are the kinds of people and energy this world needs to create balance in a sometimes dark and confusing world.

Stop with the ambulance chaser jokes. It will make you sound like you are siding with Goliath.


my fierce kind world

•January 14, 2018 • Leave a Comment

I had to prop myself against the wall while teaching a piano student last week. I saw her yesterday happier after seeing a chiropractor. Her dad had a less than sparkly opinion of chiropractors. Despite my trust in chiro treatment, the question came up of what if something is wrong inside of me that a chiro can’t catch without equipment like MRIs and X-ray machines. What if I bend to pick up a sock in a month and really start to feel pain?


My student’s dad insisted that I not go through the insurance process without an attorney. I called his friend/colleague and I feel better that the tedious communication with the insurance won’t be so tedious if someone who knows the terrain speaks for me.

Save your receipts and send them after treatment was what the insurance advised. I’ve been conservative with how to take care of myself. I don’t exactly have loads of cash to dole out and I don’t want to cash out my crypto. I don’t have a lot there either. (I’m a crypto baby.) With the current dipping trend, opening my blockfolio makes me sad. So….hip pain and stiffness….. what to do??? stretching is free. Staying in bed, sleeping under a infrared lamp like a baby chick, have been my way of taking care of myself. But it is not enough to hope that I will be okay in a couple of weeks with stretching and chiro adjustments. I don’t want to pick up that proverbial sock that will scream JNET is broken inside and I find my health and quality of life in a downward spiral.

As a rule of life, I’ve avoided doctors save for physical checkups. I’ve received gleaming reports and have taken good care of myself through healthy lifestyle choices. I avoid toxic people and bottleneck conversations. This car accident has put a spanner in the cogs and I’m not feeling right with my body. I’m off my routine. I want my car fixed and I want to feel better and my friends want that too. They are making lists of people I need to see now.

Meeting new people. Eeek! Meeting new people connected to the kind people I know….less scary. I mentioned I’m INTJ. Joy for me is solitude. Sadly, my body is messing with my joyful solitude.

I feel incredibly fortunate to have so many good people rally for me. I’m surrounded by kind people who love fiercely. When all is not right with the world, it means a lot that people care to make it right.

Be kind always and love fiercely.


fender bender christmas

•January 1, 2018 • Leave a Comment

My pretty 78 beetle got roughed up in a rear end collision, dashing out all plans to parade my nieces and nephews down Candy Cane Lane with the convertible top down during my holiday visit.

I’m still a bit rattled. It takes a lot to un-nerve me. I had been used to people slowing down to check out my car, giving way to my pretty granny classic. I had been accostumed to admiration, I never expected anyone to come at me with any sort of force or impact to hurt my baby. But it happened. After 4 hours of holiday commuting time and less than an hour from my destination, I experienced my first rear-end collision. My car was drivable. Duct tape secured the bumper to the body.

The guy admitted fault. The woman in front of me and her nephew was fine and unaffected in her tank of a truck. With my car taking the brunt of damage, we were all happy to be alive and ok. I now get to dance with his insurance company and learn the process of restoring my car to its former beauty.

AAA towed me back to LA. I arrived safely home. Tomorrow I begin the process of “mission fix the bug.”

I like doing new things….this is not one I’m looking forward to.


comic con SDCC 2018 here I come

•December 16, 2017 • Leave a Comment

I scored comic con passes for the 5th year in row and I managed to do it this year in my sleep.

It takes some pre-planning and coordination. My number one rule is to have a team ready on registration morning. Our team has at least 3 to 8 people from different cities bright-eyed and ready with everyone’s ID and special waiting room links. It gets intense waiting but the adrenaline rush upon landing into the waiting room gets celebrated as we text/chat each other. Hands are shaking as you entered ID numbers and continued listening to who’s on deck and who’s still in the wings. There’s a big wooohoo and sigh of relief as each family member and friend gets their pass. And then it’s over in less than an hour. That’s how fast comic con gets sold out.

Comic con is a family event for us. It’s when we have relatives fly in and the long lines and panels become our points to reunite.

I missed pre-reg this year and I forgot to share my details to my family. My heart was feeling a bit sorry for myself. This will be the first year that my boyfriend will not be onboard; he’s now a past tense. We are no longer a dynamic duo. So, this year, after missing pre-registration, I gave my info to my sister-in-law for my final chance at passes during general registration.

Thank God, I had my family on the ready because I did not wake up registration morning! 😵😖 I had a late night helping my friend get back to her family. I was knackered but woke up to my family’s text that they got my comic con pass. I Venmo’d my brother-in-law and the mission is successfully closed. 🎉

This geek is looking forward to San Diego Comic Con 2018, hanging out with family and getting a new ornament for my tree. ☺️


tsw day 91 being strong while delicate

•September 1, 2015 • Leave a Comment


Everyone has them.  A bad hair day, a sick day, a sad day, a day when you don’t feel or look your best.  But sometimes, life deals you not a day but a week, a month or a bad year.  We all press on.  All of us are negativity slayers.

I enjoyed a bit of calm  where my skin was not angry though a tiny bit moody.  I was comfortable enough to do things I took for granted like putting petro into my car and getting some grocery shopping in without being distracted by pain. 

I’m sitting on the ledge where time seems to elude me during my solitary moments.  I am at my best when I’m teaching my students and enjoying my time with family and friends. Alone, I meet bits of limbo time.

If you’re going through TSW, I encourage you to schedule time to see your friends at least every other week.  It’s grounding and they don’t care that you are not wearing makeup.  

I’m getting better at unpuzzling the riddle of my health.  Using absolutely NO moisturizers is working for me as well as taking a certain nutritional.  I haven’t had an ibuprofen in a long while and I’m down to a couple of antihistamines at bedtime in order to get some decent sleeps in.

Do I look awesome?  Meh.  But at least I’m not cradling an ice pack and I feel optimistic even when my skin feels a smidge moody.

It’s day 91 of saying bye bye to topical steroids.  I’ve had a couple of mini bouts of angry skin but I seem to be stabilizing and having more productive days versus pain management days.


Pressing on….



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