life in wonderland II

Life In Wonderland II


A reflection on a reflection… two years later…

Do I change, evolve or pretty much remain the same???

**************

This is how I feel about Life a lot of the time.

My friends endearments make me feel put on pedestals. And though I may throw myself freely into unknowns that stretch imagination and reality…

I am afraid of heights and terrified of going to new places sometimes.

Though I make friends easily, love how beautiful the world of people is diverse and wild like a garden…

I feel incredibly claustrophobic at many times and have a strange wish that I had powers to render myself invisible. I distance myself from others with structures of esoteric knowledge and find my most blissful moments alone.

Though I may lead a spontaneous life, finding adventures at strange turns, and wander into new worlds alone..

I prefer the serenity and saneness of quiet days with good friends where little needs to be said and nothing is amiss in standing still.

Though I am told that I am beautiful, held in high regard, seen as graceful and feminine…

I feel awkward, goofy, and geeky… and I out of grace with my body. I study dance to practice grace and poise and find that it is my most challenging discipline.

Though I enjoy my freedoms, the streams of my thoughts and my ideas without interruption..

I would like to enjoy being passionately in love and lose myself in my affections with someone, happily distracted.

Though I am independent, respected and seen as a model of strength and singularity…

I really feel quite vulnerable and fragile. I don’t know if I am made of diamonds or glass. And I spend some quiet days questioning my contentment.

I wonder many times…

In my private wonderland.

JNET

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~ by jnetsworld on July 4, 2008.

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