cupid’s crooked arrow

Cupid’s Crooked Arrow

“I’m getting married next year.”

I’ve began announcing to my friends recently. What follows that happy statement is a round of hugs and beaming smiles as well as the standard CONGRATULATIONS.

My friends and I have been enjoying a good laugh over it. You see, I don’t even have what constitutes as a regular boyfriend. I adore my solitude and independence too much to participate regularly in social rituals such as dating. I also keep entertaining thoughts to take on holy orders but what keeps me from making that decision is that I think a broader spiritual life can be had outside the structure and security of a religious community.

The ascetic life appeals to me but after a year of attending to friends weddings and watching both my brothers start their families, I’ve been given a very joyful window to observe a possibility of spirituality in the space of TWO.

Can two independent minds and hearts combine without imposing identity and ego over another? That’s a language I’d like to discover. If it exists.

I’ve managed to spurn cupid’s arrow thus far. A part of me thinks cupid won’t leave me alone and is gaining distance. It’s a bit unnerving. I might as well start announcing my wedding plans.



~ by jnetsworld on November 14, 2006.


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